I must say, the problem I encountered in the previous post is solved.. but "problem" and "solved" are the wrong words to use in the first place anyway. Essentially, that chapter is closed.
New irritants are coming.. The most recent one, and most irritating one is the B- I got for my Psych essay. That two page crap which was vetted by three diff ppl actually got me a B MINUS!! So pissed and gonna bang open a Psych prof's door when I claim it on Monday. "B"s never seem to evade me, and new signs are being added to it, just starting to wonder when the + will come. Haven seen an "A" before and really wonder how the shit to get it. Hard work doesnt pay off.. I learnt this lesson a long time ago, but the learning seems to demand another practical lesson. (Just dun let this practical lesson last for the next 4 yrs)
Studying for exams now too. Its not arduous. Strangely so. Somehow the drive is not there; I really think the sch has killed enough of it such tt studying does not deserve the usual drive anymore. I know I have a lot to catch up and I know I dun have a lot of time. I also know that Im hardly in the right psyche for studying (And the B- doesnt help at all).. This is bad.
On the non-study side, its really sad to see others, including myself, get stressed up, worked up, fucked up... (name me other relevant -ups if possible) just cos of school, problems, watever...Its another one of my ivory tower moments when I cant do anything to help. Furthermore, this gal who I have a crush on is taking completely diff mods from me next sem. Things were looking good just tt we arent really meant to be the kind that can go to lectures and hang out together. Pity.
I just realised, that all my hopes for uni are kind of shattered. I thot of coming in and adapting well (the adaptation is fine but not academically). Grades arent the best as I hope to, my social life is hardly existent and the irritants just never seem to go away.. I dun even time to get a new female fren to hang around with, much to say for a girlfriend. These irritants arent enough to bring one down, but are enough to make one wonder why the heck some ppl (even JC teachers) actually say that university life is easier than JC life.
The worst thing is that in view of such bleak conditions, I dun really give a damn about it. Well not enough damn anyway.
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