I just got sick of studying today and went back to my old blog (the one without "again") to pay a visit. I must say my English was so much more proficient than. Not that Im saying I am not good now, but my vocabulary does not seem to be appearing often enough in my recent blog posts, compared to my old blog's. Gotta brush up, or rather, throw in the big words now.. Grammar improvements are also seriously needed. Somehow the profundity of language and content does not seem to resonate in my recent posts. They just seem like random posts of sianness, lethargy and.. ageing? Well whatever it is, if I wanna write better, I better get school out of the way. Im pretty sure its eating up my life in ways that I have yet to discover.
From reading previous posts, I recalled that I really hate driving (I still hate it now!!) because I almost got into accidents on the road before. Whole families can jaywalk in front of you as if the road is their living room. Yup I still remember that hilarious horror scene. If pedestrians and fellow drivers start learning how to use the road with more consideration, I will consider liking driving more. Sheesh... I am sure that if I drive more, and the experiences are more positive, I will like driving, more..
3 more days till this semester is over. Somehow I feel that every sem is the worst sem ever, but things just seem to get worse with each passing sem, and impending sem. Is uni really all about the sems getting worse, or is it just me not being able, or willing, to catch up with the momentum? Its probably a mix of both. Perhaps there isnt any inability or unwillingness at all. It could just be a sign of near-burnout. Nah I highly doubt any of these are the reasons. I guess I just need a break, without grades at the back of my head. Thank goodness the 3mth break is in place. The only major event during the break (for now..) is ICT. ICT better be fun.
SG
Monday, 4 May 2009
Sunday, 3 May 2009
After thoughts
Ok my previous post was crappy and should not even be published, but Im gonna leave it there anyway. Apparently, remnants of my narcisstic self still persists.
Many times I have had to do things alone, therefore, Im so used to getting things done by myself. Even if the quality does not match up to expectations, at least I know I have done my best and I wont have any regrets. When group members or other ppl start coming into my life, I just get defensive and still want things my way.
Things changed around 2mths ago of cos, when dearie entered my life as a gf. I know that I cannot carry on life as a narcissist and self-centred jerk (well these two traits occur half the time). I do feel myself being a better person with dearie around. I know that I do not exactly bare my heart to people (for one thing there isnt really much to bare, its usually just ranting which I will solve soon) but Im really glad that dearie is still around me to give me the morning sms and that she is there for me to say goodnight to. Of cos I can do it to anybody else, but I wont..
I am in still control of my life, but now, I am glad that there is someone out there who wants to share it with me. I can feel my narcissistic self dying... Good.
SG
Many times I have had to do things alone, therefore, Im so used to getting things done by myself. Even if the quality does not match up to expectations, at least I know I have done my best and I wont have any regrets. When group members or other ppl start coming into my life, I just get defensive and still want things my way.
Things changed around 2mths ago of cos, when dearie entered my life as a gf. I know that I cannot carry on life as a narcissist and self-centred jerk (well these two traits occur half the time). I do feel myself being a better person with dearie around. I know that I do not exactly bare my heart to people (for one thing there isnt really much to bare, its usually just ranting which I will solve soon) but Im really glad that dearie is still around me to give me the morning sms and that she is there for me to say goodnight to. Of cos I can do it to anybody else, but I wont..
I am in still control of my life, but now, I am glad that there is someone out there who wants to share it with me. I can feel my narcissistic self dying... Good.
SG
Random post to emphasise why I should always do things myself...
I just found out that I got a stupid B- for my Atyp group project, the poster thing... Argh That means I got B- for half that module (coupled with my B- paper.) This module is simple de lo, argh... forget about rationalising why things are easy...
I KNEW FROM THE START this poster wont get good results.. Maybe its time to apply some social theories here.. Told all of them that we gotta do it like a mini acad paper, more structure, throw in some references here and there but NO.... They wanted to be concise and creative.. Irritating when people think that they are doing something concise and creative, when it is actually too general (so concise until it becomes generic) and does not meet the lecturer's expectations (creativity entails going out of the box rite, in this case, it went out of the expectations too)... Apparently I was supposedly the leader. Of cos they listened to wat I said and did make changes, but somehow the crucial points did not get consensus. Cant help it that it was done in such a rush.
Hello, Devt is easy but its not a high school kids project.. Argh irritating... I shld have done it ALL by myself. Probably grab one of those Yes-people out there to get my work done.
Why am I even sounding so elitist on this, not like Im gonna get an A for this module. This sem better be good to me, one way or another. Sick of getting B- when I completely doubt I deserve them. You can throw eggs at me for being a self-loving narcissist but YA.. I am that good!!! Argh....
SG
I KNEW FROM THE START this poster wont get good results.. Maybe its time to apply some social theories here.. Told all of them that we gotta do it like a mini acad paper, more structure, throw in some references here and there but NO.... They wanted to be concise and creative.. Irritating when people think that they are doing something concise and creative, when it is actually too general (so concise until it becomes generic) and does not meet the lecturer's expectations (creativity entails going out of the box rite, in this case, it went out of the expectations too)... Apparently I was supposedly the leader. Of cos they listened to wat I said and did make changes, but somehow the crucial points did not get consensus. Cant help it that it was done in such a rush.
Hello, Devt is easy but its not a high school kids project.. Argh irritating... I shld have done it ALL by myself. Probably grab one of those Yes-people out there to get my work done.
Why am I even sounding so elitist on this, not like Im gonna get an A for this module. This sem better be good to me, one way or another. Sick of getting B- when I completely doubt I deserve them. You can throw eggs at me for being a self-loving narcissist but YA.. I am that good!!! Argh....
SG
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