Its the first Bravo I got and thats of cos nothing near expectations. The Applause is not there, and thats what matters...
Anyway bigger issues than just CAPtivating glory.. I have discovered that there are many ppl whom I wish to just meet up and chill with, but time does not allow. I cant even recall the number of appts I have rejected just to accompany my 5 wives. What makes it worse is that I get distracted with other forms of recreation anyway, than hanging out.. Its really comforting to know that there are ppl in school to hang around with, but I need to remember that I still have an out-of-school social life. Yet reminders are just not enough..
Sometimes too much of something is really not good.. It just gives u more opportunities to wonder about the greener pasture elsewhere, that u deserve better and whatever effort u have put in can just be forgotten and recycled into new enthusiasm for something. I always knew I have high expectations, especially since I know I can meet them. However, this drive has never really been shown and has always been overshadowed by lackadaisical heck. Its really quite a jump that I have to show it all out. Be it as a moral, academic or social judge, things just do not seem like they should be like this anymore... Life is a disappointment, it has always been anyway. But why must this open secret just bare its ugly self at such a volatile period?
Snakes shed their skins like nobody's biz and get to love something new without even bothering about the shedded. Why is that Man just needs so long to bitch over things, contemplate yadayada... Cognition processes just do not seem like a boon in this case. Maybe ability to ponder and think is not that great after all. Ignorance can be bliss. After all, if we do not know that something better is out there, we will not expect so much.
Explain to me the CAPtivating illusion, and why greener pastures exist.
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